EUROPEAN DIRECTIVE
The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English
will be the official language of the EU rather than German, which was
the other possibility.
As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's Government conceded that
English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a five
year plan that would be known as Euro English".
In the first year, "S" will replace the soft "C" . Sertainly, this will
make sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "C" will be dropped in
favour of the letter "K". This should klear up konfusion and musik
keyboards kan have one less letter.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the
tiresome "PH" will be replaced with the "F". This will make words like
"fotograf" 20% shorter.
In the third year publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted
to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
Governments will enkorage the removal of double letters, which have
always ben a deterent to akurate speling.
Also al wi agre that the horible mes of the silent "E" in the language
is disgrasful, and should be don away with.
By the fourth yer, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing 'TH"
with "Z" and "W" with "V". During ze fifz yar, ze unesesary "O" kan be
dropd from vords kontaning "OU" and similar changes vud of kors be aplid
to ozer kombinations of leters.
After zis fifz yer ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no
mor trubls or difikultis and evriven vil find it ezi tu understand ech
ozer.
ZE DREM VIL FINALI KUM TRU!!
| THE DREAM WILL COME TRUE!! - Mislik , 18.09.2003 09:18 MSK |
