Re: For the Vault's Sake - Plus , 17.12.2000 11:27 MSK

The sun disappeared beyond the high peaks of the mountains that surrounded the valley Matterhorn. In the dark, the Hexoid Guardian peered at the vicinity, listening to the night noises and cautiously approached the entrance to the Ice Ghost's dwelling.
- Hey Ghostie, - a whisper emerged in the dark.
- Ghostie is your ass, fool, I'm the Ice Ghost, - an answer shot back at him.
- What's the difference, you, frozen H2O?
- Infinite, six-sided idiot! Many Ghosts exist; only one Ice Ghost does.
- Oooh… Heh, and there is only one unique Hexoid in the world!
"Even one is too much," – a thought appeared in the Ghost's mind; but it didn't escape his sallow lips – the intruder looked much meaner and stronger than he did.
- So, what is up?
- Got a thing to tell ya, my little overfrozen friend. Are you being teased more than usual these days?
- As usual! – normally pale, the Ghost's face darkened with fury. – And all for this… dripping icicle. Fucking oldsters stand in queue! Ya lucky – ya only got that stinking belt…
- Stinking is your ass, - the Hexoid's voice sounded somewhat offended. – It is a very good caster's belt! Would you only know I'm even being cycled… sometimes.
- Oh yeah? And who wastes his time doing this foolish thing? – sneered the Ghost.
- Plus, for instance.
- Ohh, feeling week and tired, buddy? EVEN Plus is able to DO you!
- By the way, he only takes me in two runs, - said the Hexoid proudly.
- Oh-wow, just enough time to scribble down your last will, eh?
- Hey, you, brainless ice, would you shut up, you…
- Hey, calm down, I was merely pulling craddle pranks on ya. Plus does me in one run.
- Ah, I've got a never-failing thing against him – I swallow the girth at the first sight of him so he never gets any!
- How is that? – the Ghost now spoke in a shocked sort of voice.
- Easy, I eat it! Empty room, dull world… not a single wardrobe to lock it in… Stupid Plus wouldn't be smart enough to check it…
- Exactly, - bloodless lips formed a smile. – Wouldcha know what I am doing when he comes to me? I _hide_ the icicle immediately.
The Hexoid scanned the room intently. It was as empty as ever.
He stared back at the Ghost.
- Where do you hide it? It isn't small enough to be swallowed, hmm…
- It isn't your business, - suddenly the Ghost seemed angry and worried. – But you should get the idea – he can't figure out he has to check everything… so he sacrifices it with the corpse.
- Uh-oh… and do you know how this is called? – an idea seemed to visit the Hexoid.
- Hey six-sided walking stick, you'd better shut up!
- Okay, okay, I'm all silent. I actually came to you on business. You know, I sorta got… used to Plussy. He fucked his belt off and now can't blow out his horn with his mana; must be sorta tired of repeating that "if it wouldnt for that fucking crash, my mana would be…" and so on for two pages. And recently I've even got a few avatars visiting me…
- Avatars?!! What the fuck do they have to do with you?
- I don't know if it is the fuck they're visiting for, - the Hexoid didn't notice the irony in the voice of his long dead friend. – But I think…
He now leaned closer to the cold body; a hot whisper almost burned his sensitive skin.
- With all this jazz, wouldn't you think the girth hath been changed? Maybe now it is… more than mere 10 mana…
- So much like of people! They'll murder their parents for an extra point of mana! Half of the Sloth would be sitting here, and the other half would be screaming loudly at them, blaming and flaming them for no repops. But why would the retards need it then? They've got some deadly sashes I heard, nifty belts and so on.
- And if it weren't for an extra point? If it were for ten extra points?!
- Oh yeah and I'm Jake in disguise. Such a girth would've cost 100M or even more…
- That's what I've been talking about last hour, silly!
- Wow, - the Ghost seemed to be shaken up. – That'd be the coolest waist thing ever! Do you… feel anything?
- Wha? Oh yea, feeling real bad now. My abdomen is not capable of feathers, y'know…
- Fool! You wear the belt – feel the mana increase?
- I wish I knew, - a heavy sigh resounded in the cave. – To tell ya the truth I've never been feeling the mana it gives… musta bin for the low int or something..
- Heh, - now the Ghost was talking skeptically, - even if it were all the thirty mana, cha wouldnt get anything of it but buttache…
- Talk about buttache, you, iciclish pervert! Idiot! How is that icicle, eh? Musta bin cooooold…
- What're you intending to, sonovabitch?!
- OK, calm down, calm down, nvm.
- Whad iz diz – nwm?
- Nuts Wailing in the Moon
The Ghost shook with anger and fury. He screeched, wailing, as the soft moonlight emerged from the clouds covering the sky, causing the Hexoid flee out of the cavern. Five ticks later, he returned.
- Are you going nuts, or what? Hey cool down, man, nvm is Never Mind, kinda "lets get this fucked off" – translating into your native language.
- I'm speaking seriously, you either talk about the business or return back with haste into your dirty den!
- I've got a plan! If the girth now really turned out to be this cool thing, let's sell it for 100M!
- Oh god is there a place for any brains in your sixsided body?! How in the hell are we supposed to sell the girth?! And why in the hell d'you need the money, idiot? Cha be buying a vault or what? Or bribing Plus?
- Exactly, my overfrozen friend, exactly! We'll buy a vault or two and we'll lock up there and won't be disturbed for the rest of out lives!
- Hmmmmmm… well… but… how to sell it?
- Hear me what, we'll pick up a newbie, a son of yours, so it'll be the most brainless thing on sloth, besides you of course, and we'll hand him the girth for him to sell for 100M and half the income is ours. Shall they ask him where he got it, shall he answer them he found it lying on the road!
- You seriously think he would make it all the way through the Matterhorn? A bugbear maggot will punch him down with no much problem! Then he'll complain to a god about you pkilling him and cha get wiped!
- Pkill? Wipe? I'm a mob!
- The pkilling of a newbie, - the Ghost spoke in a solemn tone as though reading a Law, - is the murdering with the violant circumstances. To be punished by wipe.
- In the most pervert form, you, icicle-lover!
- You again…
- Kidding, kidding, calm down.
Hexoid and the Ghost stared deeply at each other, and seven broad grins appeared on their faces – six of them were that of Hexoid, and the remaining one was the hook-nosed face of the Ice Ghost.
In the distance the steps could now be heard.
- Uhoh, ya got a guest, - the Ghost jerked up. – Get back to there! And eat the girth, quick, quick!
- chat with ya l8r, - shot the hexoid in the air, running his fastest to his dwelling; feathers down his six throats; he was coughing loudly because the third and fifth throats got the largest feathers which couldn't be swallowed easily and tears were streaming down his six pairs of cheeks.
The Dawn was setting in the Matterhorn.